A palliative care nurse named Bronnie Ware once recorded the regrets she heard most often from people in their final weeks. Among them were wishes to stay in touch with friends, let themselves be happier and have the courage to express how they truly felt.
At his Sconetime gatherings across the coast, Sunshine Coast Foodie Martin Duncan is creating connections that help keep loneliness at bay and perhaps even ease some of the regrets that can come with later life.
Over fresh scones, jam and cream in heritage halls, older people are finding a reason to get out, meet new people and maintain friendships, while younger generations are finding opportunities to connect with them too.
Take Shirley, for example. After moving out of her mansion and into a retirement home, she found Sconetime gave her a new lease on her social life.
“She came along, joined a table of regulars, and lit up the room,” Martin said.
“We recently had Year Twos from Buderim Mountain State School perform a Mary Poppins show for guests in their late 70s and 80s, including a 101-year-old. I think our elders can become a bit invisible, and that’s really sad. I see real value in bringing the generations together,” Martin said.
“There’s nothing better than seeing a six- or seven-year-old sitting there asking awkward questions, or telling a joke, with an elder of the community. We really need more of that. There’s so much value in the wisdom of those who’ve been before us.”
It’s this belief in the power of connection that has made Martin one of the coast’s most recognisable community figures and earned him a nomination for Australia’s Kindest Person.
Since relocating to Caloundra, he has thrown himself into local life, partnering with the Taste Caloundra team to champion the restaurants, cafés and producers that make the region so delicious.
Food has always been Martin’s love language. Growing up in New Zealand, life was simple and abundant. He spent weekends camping with his family and watched his grandmother turn almost anything into something delicious.
When he was seven, she handed him a Women’s Weekly cookbook and set him loose.
“I would just make everything in that book till I’d got it right,” he laughs.
His family became willing taste-testers along the way, even braving a memorable blue pavlova.
“Blue and food,” he says with a chuckle, “should never be combined.”
That early apprenticeship set Martin on the path to qualifying as a chef at 19 and brought him to Australia at 21. A stint as a “party boy” on Hamilton Island eventually led him to Terrigal on the Central Coast, where he opened his first restaurant, Haven Beach Café.
Years in boutique hotels and restaurants followed, but Martin eventually realised his real gift wasn’t just in the kitchen. It was in bringing people together, creating a sense of belonging and helping them shine through shared food and community.
That gift took on new meaning after he lost his beloved mother, Maureen, to bowel cancer last year.
In the aftermath, Martin was struck by how much of her life he didn’t know. It inspired him to create heartfelt questions for seniors to answer over the dinner table, along with a companion list to help adults connect more meaningfully with children and teenagers.
“We’re really bad at just conversing with young people,” he says. “Finding common ground to connect and open them up is important.”
When asked where his kindness comes from, Martin’s answer is immediate: his mum. Maureen filled her life with community gardens, emergency housing for the elderly and an endless supply of second-hand white goods for anyone who needed them.
“Mum instilled in me the value of being good to others. She taught me that you can get whatever you want with honey. And that’s kindness.”
These days, Martin’s business card lists Sunshine Coast Foodie, Mary Valley Foodie and Moreton Bay Foodie. But talk to him for five minutes and it’s clear that food is just the excuse. The most important ingredient is people.
